Friday, February 05, 2010

Grandma Jean... Bruce, and other thoughts....


My grandma Jean passed away Jan 23... she had suffered a major stroke more than a week earlier and though she amazingly made a bit of a recovery, it was only temporary. Gratefully, I was able to fly back for a week and spend some time with her before she passed away. Unfortunatly, I wasn't able to be there for her funeral, but I was able to design her funeral program...here's the front and back...
Its hard to really realize she's gone... and that my Grandma Lemke is gone as well... As I prepared for my trip home to see Grandma Jean, I found my self thinking about how I needed to make sure I stopped in to see Grandma Lemke... I guess it still isn't real. I love them both so very much and hope they are at peace with those they love. Of course, I also hope we will soon be able to do their temple work, but we'll have to see when the time is right for that.
Unfortunately, it appears as though tragedy has not quite passed us by yet. About a week ago my uncle Bruce who came and visited us last summer and fall with my parents went into the doctor with what he thought were stress fractures in his foot. Instead, it turned out the pain was being caused by several blood clots in his thigh (even though he's already on blood thinners) and they admitted him immediately to the hospital. By the following morning he suffered a stroke and no longer has use of his right side. His speech was also affected, which is especially tragic since Bruce is ALWAYS handy with a joke or funny comment! It may spare the staff some bad jokes, but it's really putting a damper on his ability to cope.

After seeing my grandma improve so many days after a stroke, I'm still hopeful he'll recover at least mostly... Unfortunately, today is not the day for that I guess... they just moved him to the intensive care unit of a different hospital...

My poor baby boy... this pregnacy has not been very focused on his little life! It began with the funeral of my Grandma Lemke and the chaos of moving into a new home, amazing visitors and me learning how to be a mom to a toddler. Then there were abnormally chaotic holidays, starting around Halloween and lasting into the first weeks of Jan, when my other grandma fell ill... On top of that I've been struggling to wrap my mind around the fact that there is a little BOY coming into this home... I love him so so soooo much.... but what am I supposed to do with a boy?! I know it's lame to feel that way... I've come to embrace the thought and get excited about it in the last week or two but I feel like there's so much I need to do to prepare and I just don't even know where to start.

Don't get me wrong- we have had TONS of wonderful times and experiences the last 8 months... it hasn't all been tragic. Thankfully, we have been blessed by lots of time with WONDERFUL family and Fantastic friends! I just wish I knew where to start so that I felt I was ready for this beautiful boy to join our family instead of feeling like I'll be playing catch-up from the moment he gets here!

But I didn't want this post to be about me.... I just wanted to share what's been going on lately and I guess I started to vent a little too much! Hopefully I'll post some more of the crazy and adorable things our little Priya has been up to soon... she certainly is an amazing joy and light that seems to shine no matter what else is going on! We are so grateful for her!

thank you for your patience with me. we love and are so grateful for all of the amazing people that bless our lives constantly... thank you...

With love, Bree

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

What beautiful thoughts about your grandmothers. You are blessed with the memories.
As for Henry (or whatever you choose to name him) he's a lucky kid to have such a talented and loving mom.
You'll do fine with him. Boys are (usually) less drama and more kinetic energy to keep an eye on.
And no air-drying during diaper changes ;)
Thanks for your blog. I love hearing from you.
xoxo
Dad H

Brooke said...

With all of the loss it brings home that life is so very precious. While sad, it is a special time for him to be joining your family because of what has transpired.

You have a gift to know how to make everyone feel special male and female and this little boy is lucky to have a mommy like you. What are you suppose to do with a boy? Just be Bree and it'll all work out.

Love you and yours....

Anne said...

I have complete confidence that you will do exactly what your little boy needs when he arrives! Honestly, my experience has taught me a couple of things -- make sure you have a washcloth or cloth diaper handy to cover up the equipment whenever you change his diaper and, as he grows older, he will probably like it if you make dinosaur "roaring" noises and rough-house a little with him. Other than that.... ;) You'll do a great job with him and he won't know it if you feel like you are playing catch-up! Love you!

Wendy said...

I think that any pregnancy after your first has to be different than the first. I mean, with the first, you only really have that to focus on! But once you have other kids to take care of, the pregnancy just kind of rolls along. I don't think that means you love your baby any less (at least I hope not!), but just that you have more things to worry about. Mine has been the same way. I remember sitting at home every night when I was pregnant with Sophie just reading pregnancy books and comepletely focused on everything pregnancy related. But I don't have the time to do that now. I hope this little girl understands. I am excited for her to come, just like you are excited for yours to come. You are a great mom, for sure.

Pam said...

Bree, I feel for you. My Grandparents have all passed on, the last this summer. Before my Grandfather passed, he had a stroke. And my Dad has had many blood clots in his legs (while on blood thinning medications) and many surgeries due to swelling on the brain.

And when I first found out I was having a boy 7 years ago, I couldn't believe it and wondered what I was supposed to do with a boy!

The things you and your family are going through are very difficult and are always in your thoughts and pulling at your emotions. I know how it has been for me during those times and I'll be praying for all of you.

Sometimes it's nice to know others have walked a similar path and the Lord is always there to light the way. Love you!